============= *------------------------- 1 Corinthians 7:3. Let the husband render unto the wife due benevolence: and likewise also the wife unto the husband. The literal meaning of the Greek word "EUNOIA," which was translated "benevolence" in this verse, is"kindness; euphemistically, conjugal duty" (Strong's Concordance). The American Heritage Dictionary defines "conjugal" as "of or relating to marriage or the marital relationship." This verse is speaking of not withholding the sexual relationship from one's mate. This point is expounded on in 1 Corinthians 7:4-5. Special attention needs to be paid to the word "due" here. There are sexual actions that are not normal, and God never expects a marriage partner to perform ungodly sexual acts. No one can honestly try to use this scripture to demand any type of perverted act from his or her mate. *------------------------- 1 Corinthians 7:4. The wife hath not power of her own body, but the husband: and likewise also the husband hath not power of his own body, but the wife. These are some amazing statements that do not sit well with the thinking of most people today. It would be unthinkable to many people that their mates could have access to them sexually at any time. They would say, "What about my rights?" Paul was saying that when people marry, they yield their rights to their mates, even down to the most intimate details. If people today would realize that this is the way it is in a godly marriage, they would take the selection of a mate much more seriously, and they would have fewer problems in their marriages. Of course, it needs to be qualified that the Lord is speaking about normal sexual relationships. This is not saying that either partner has to yield to any type of perverted sexual acts {Herman's Parenthesis: including pain}. *------------------------- 1 Corinthians 7:5. Defraud ye not one the other, except it be with consent for a time, that ye may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again, that Satan tempt you not for your incontinency. The Greek word that was translated "defraud" here is "APOSTEREO," and it "signifies to rob, despoil, defraud" (Vine's Expository Dictionary). This is a continuation of the point Paul started making in 1 Corinthians 7:3. Within marriage, one partner does not have the right to withhold normal sexual relationships from his or her mate. Here Paul gave the guidelines for the only exception to this instruction. To withdraw sexually from marriage, there must be mutual consent for a limited period of time for the express purpose of seeking God through fasting and prayer. No other exceptions are given. The fact that fasting is involved during this time of separation means that this is a relatively short period of time. Any couple who has stopped sexual relationships for extended periods of time is not functioning in a healthy physical relationship. The word "incontinency" in the Greek means"want of self-restraint" (Strong's Concordance). Instead of Paul telling the individuals to get their desires in line, he commanded the sexual relationship to resume so that the temptation would be diminished. The answer to sexual immorality is not unlimited relations within marriage, but infrequency of relations within marriage is a temptation that Paul commanded couples to avoid. *------------------------- 1 Corinthians 7:10. And unto the married I command, yet not I, but the Lord, Let not the wife depart from her husband: 1 Corinthians 7:10-11 is not Paul's opinion; these verses are clear commands from the Lord, voiced by Jesus during His earthly ministry (Matthew 5:32, 19:3-9; Mark 10:2-12; and Luke 16:18). The word"depart," as used here and in 1 Corinthians 7:11 and 15, is speaking of divorce. 1 Corinthians 7:11 makes this clear when it says that if she departs, she must remain unmarried. Therefore, this departing is the equivalent of divorce. *------------------------- 1 Corinthians 7:14. For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband: else were your children unclean; but now are they holy. One of the probable reasons that the Corinthians desired clarification on this matter was because many of them were in mixed marriages. Their mates not only were non-Christians, but also may have been involved in worshiping other gods and in pagan sexual orgies (see note 1 at Acts 18:1). They questioned whether or not God wanted them united with unbelievers through marriage. Wouldn't that defile them? How would such marriages affect their children? This verse answers these questions. The power of the Lord in the Christian is stronger than the power of the devil in the unbeliever in the marriage union. The believer sanctifies (sets apart) the unbelieving mate from the defilement that he or she would otherwise bring into the marriage. The Lord purifies the marriage situation through the believing mate so that even the children are blessed instead of cursed. Like any of the other benefits of salvation, this sanctifying power of the Christian mate has to be released through faith. It is not automatic, but it is available to every believer so that any marital situation can be sanctified. *------------------------- 1 Corinthians 7:15. But if the unbelieving depart, let him depart. A brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases: but God hath called us to peace. Many sincere people differ on their interpretation of what this verse means when it says that believers are"not under bondage in such cases." The liberal interpretation would be that Paul was saying they are free to remarry if their unsaved mates divorce them. The conservative view would be that Paul was saying they do not have any obligation to fight to hold the marriage together. Let the unbelievers divorce, but remarriage is still not an option, as stated in 1 Corinthians 7:11. *------------------------- 1 Corinthians 7:16. For what knowest thou, O wife, whether thou shalt save thy husband? or how knowest thou, O man, whether thou shalt save thy wife? Paul expressed the reason he believed staying with the unsaved mate is so important. It was because the believing mate may lead the unbelieving one to faith in Christ. Sad to say, this would not be high on the list of reasons for many Christians today, but it should be. When things are looked at through the light of God's priorities, the eternal, spiritual matters are infinitely more important than all the temporal things that people hold so dear. As Jesus said,"Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends" (John 15:13). Surely Christians laying aside their own desires to remain with their lost mates in hopes of seeing those mates saved would be one of the greatest expressions of Christ-like love. This line of reasoning is not very popular in today's self-centered generation."What about my rights?" someone would say, and that is precisely the problem. The root of most divorces is selfishness. If Christians would seriously think about what their actions are doing to their mates, their children, their parents, their friends, their witness, and their society, they would not be so quick to choose divorce. It is time for us Christians to resign from the"Me Generation." We need to pull our thumbs out of our mouths and grow up. It's time to think of others more than ourselves. --- It is very interesting the way Paul stated the possibilities of the unbelieving mate coming to the Lord. He said that it might happen and it might not. This is radically different than the way some people preach praying for unbelieving mates. Some people have mistakenly interpreted passages of Scripture like Acts 16:31 to say that we can"claim" our loved ones for Christ and they will be saved regardless. That is not so (see note 4 at Acts 16:31). One of the most sacred trusts that God has given man is the right to choose. God will protect that right regardless of the consequences. People must come to faith in Christ through their own choice. We can certainly encourage them and do battle with the spiritual powers that blind them (2 Corinthians 4:4), but the choice is theirs. Not understanding this has caused many godly Christians to feel like failures because their lost mates have not been born again. Certainly, this was not the attitude Paul had here. ------------------------- 1 Corinthians 7:17. But as God hath distributed to every man, as the Lord hath called every one, so let him walk. And so ordain I in all churches. There are so many variations of marital situations that it is impossible to give general instructions that will cover all of the possibilities. Therefore, the individuals must let God lead them personally in their own situations within the boundaries of Paul's previous statements. This is what Paul was advocating here. ---- Paul was assuring the Corinthians that these instructions, however limiting they might seem, were not unusual. He had given similar instructions to all the churches he oversaw. He was treating this matter the same way that he had dealt with it in other churches. *------------------------- 1 Corinthians 7:20. Let every man abide in the same calling wherein he was called. Paul's statements in 1 Corinthians 7:17-24 mention circumcision and slavery, but in fact, they are a continuation of his teaching on the obligation of a Christian mate in an un-Christian marriage (see note 16 at 1 Corinthians 7:12). This verse is the real point he was making. Christians should redeem the situations they find themselves in at the time of salvation and not worry about undoing the past. Just as eggs cannot be unscrambled, so the mistakes made in marriage before salvation cannot be rectified by divorcing the unbeliever. Paul was saying that whatever marital situation believers find themselves in at the time of salvation is where they should stay (this would not apply to extramarital relations or perversions such as homosexuality). Some think that if their marriages were adulterous affairs from the beginning, then surely God would have them to dissolve those marriages. Paul was speaking against that. It is very clear that King David's relationship with Bathsheba was adulterous. Yet, when he repented, God forgave him and blessed his marriage with Bathsheba to such a degree that the Lord personally named their child Jedidiah (2 Samuel 12:24-25), meaning"beloved of Jah" (Strong's Concordance). **Likewise, marriages that were totally wrong before salvation can be sanctified (1 Corinthians 7:14) and redeemed so that they become blessed relationships.** *------------------------- 1 Corinthians 7:22. For he that is called in the Lord, being a servant, is the Lord's freeman: likewise also he that is called, being free, is Christ's servant. Paul was saying that those Christians who are not slaves to any person are slaves to Christ (see note 1 at Romans 1:1). The whole concept of absolute freedom that many espouse today was foreign to Paul and scriptural truth. True Christians have come under the Lordship of Jesus. They do not own themselves (1 Corinthians 7:23). ------------------------- 1 Corinthians 7:27. Art thou bound unto a wife? seek not to be loosed. Art thou loosed from a wife? seek not a wife. This is a very clear command for a married person not to seek divorce. ---- This is a very clear command for single people not to seek mates. This comes as a radical statement to most people today. Many Christian singles feel compelled to get married. They pray for mates constantly. That is contrary to what Paul spoke here. *If it is God's will for you to be married, the correct way to find that mate is not to go seeking him or her. Instead, seek the Lord and He will bring the perfect mate to you. Proverbs 18:22 says, "Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing, and obtaineth favour of the LORD." Psalms 34:10 says, "The young lions do lack, and suffer hunger: but they that seek the LORD shall not want any good thing." Therefore, if a mate is a good thing for you, the Lord will bring that person to you as you seek Him. God brought Eve to Adam, Rebekah to Isaac, and Ruth to Boaz, and He will bring your mate to you if you will seek Him and not a mate. This takes all the frustration out of finding a mate, and it also will prevent choosing the wrong mate. The whole dating process as we know it in the western world today is not God's way. If you shop around and become emotionally and physically involved with a potential mate and then approach the Lord to ask, "Is this the one?" you are going to have a hard time hearing God's voice. Your emotions and hormones are going to be speaking so loudly that it will be hard to hear the still, small voice of God. **The scriptural way of receiving your mate from God is the way that Paul put forth here. Are you single? Don't seek a mate! Seek God, and if the Lord wills for you to be married, He will arrange it. {Herman's Note "The One"} *------------------------- 1 Corinthians 7:30. And they that weep, as though they wept not; and they that rejoice, as though they rejoiced not; and they that buy, as though they possessed not; Because our lives are so short (see note 7 at 1 Corinthians 7:29), we need to quit weeping over past problems and get on with the job of reaching the lost. ---- Because our lives are so short (see note 7 at 1 Corinthians 7:29), we need to not become so occupied with our own pleasures that we forget the task of winning the lost. Note 10 at 1 Corinthians 7:30: Because our lives are so short (see note 7 at 1 Corinthians 7:29), we need to not get so involved in the affairs of business that we fail to accomplish our part of reaching the lost. *------------------------- 1 Corinthians 7:33. But he that is married careth for the things that are of the world, how he may please his wife. Paul was not saying that married people are more carnal than single ones. He was simply saying that marriage increases people's physical responsibilities and makes them spend more time being occupied with the affairs of this life. If God gives people the grace to be single, they should use it to seek the Lord without distraction. **------------------------- 1 Corinthians 7:40. But she is happier if she so abide, after my judgment: and I think also that I have the Spirit of God. This is one of the most radical statements on marriage in the Bible: Marriage was not designed to make us happy. Paul said we would be happier if we remain single. Many people look to marriage to provide things for them that God never intended marriage to do. Therefore, it is just a matter of time until these false expectations produce disappointment and frustration, which often get directed at the mate. They think,"My lack of joy and peace is all your fault. If you were the spouse you were supposed to be, I'd be happy." However, marriage wasn't intended to make us happy or fulfilled or to take away loneliness. All these needs should be met through our relationship with the Lord. Only when people find their happiness and peace and fulfillment in the Lord will they be able to really enjoy their marriages. A lack of understanding this is the cause of many marital problems. People's mates can never be to them what God is meant to be. --- This is quite an understatement. Paul certainly had the Spirit of the Lord, and the Holy Spirit had Paul also. Even though he had said that many of his statements in this chapter were not direct commands from God (see note 9 at 1 Corinthians 7:6), Paul's opinion was not to be dismissed as inferior.